Husband and Wife

My wife and I have the secret to making a marriage last. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, a little wine, good food and companionship. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in Florida and mine is in N.Y.

---

I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.

---

I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?"

"Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!"

I suggested, "How about the kitchen?"

---

We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

---

She has an electric blender, electric toaster, and electric bread-maker. Then she said "There are too many gadgets, and no place to sit down!"

So I Bought her an electric chair.

---

My wife told me the car wasn't running well, there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was, she told me "In the lake."

---

My wife is on a new diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost weight, but BOY, can she now climb a tree!

---

She got a mudpack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.

---

She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?"

"No, jump in!"

Submitted by: Rob

. /