Types of Farts

ALZHEIMER FART

Gets lost on the way to your anus, and turns back and comes out your throat (a.k.a. burp)

ARROGANT FART

"My farts don't stink", or "Girls don't fart".

ARTSY FART

A true work of art. Major points from the judges for smell, color, texture, and longevity.

ASSAULT FART

Louder than bombs, with flames shooting out your ass.

BEER FARTS

After consuming large amounts of beer, your body turns into a still, and the fermentation process continues.

BRAIN FART

You need to fart, but you suffer from a mental block.

DONKEY FART

Comes from an ass and honks.

GHOST FART

The ones you lay in your sleep that don't make a sound and don't smell.

HOME ALONE FART

The loud, smelly ones you lay in the comfort of your own home.

JAIL FART

Stuck inside you all day, then makes its escape as soon as you get home from work.

NOT ME FART

Releasing the hounds in public, and blaming it on someone else.

OLD FART

Very ripe and pungent, comes without warning, and makes your hemorrhoids flap.

SHOE FART

You bend over to tie your shoe laces and Oops!

TANK FART

Your farts can also be used as gas.

TIRE FART

A real blow-out.

U.F.O. FART

When someone else releases a NOT ME FART.

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